Being There...

Last week I had to fulfill one of the most difficult duties as First Lady. A young couple in our church lost their dad in a boating accident. Because of the weather we were experiencing from Hurricane Irma, it took the recovery team longer than expected to recover his body. It was heartbreaking to see the family cry out in agony.They were not only grieving the loss of their loved one, but suffering through the wait of locating his body. I felt helpless and I really didn't know what to do so I prayed silently to God asking him to please give me the words that could help this family in someway. The only thing he told me to do, was be there. 

Please keep in mind, my husband and I didn't know the entire family, we only knew the young couple. While we wanted to let them know we cared, we didn't want to seem intrusive. I was surprised when the mother of the family requested we come back to the site on day two of the search. My husband and I prayed with them. We spoke words of encouragement into their ears, brought them meals and hugged them when needed but still, it didn't feel like it was enough. 

We spent four of the five search and recovery days waiting with the family at the boating dock. Most of the time was spent waiting with family in silence as they watch the recovery team work tirelessly. After five days of searching, the authorities found the body of their missing father in the late afternoon. The discovery was met with mixed emotion. Happiness, because now the family could bring him home and sorrow because his death was now a confirmed reality. We met with the family at the hospital as they waited for the Coroner to complete paperwork. I thanked God for giving the family closure by bringing the search to an end but surprisingly, I found myself giving him thanks for an unexpected lesson that I learned. 

You see, just before we left the hospital, the mother of the young couple pulled me to the side, hugged me and whispered, "Thank you so much for being here. You don't know how much you've helped me." I was surprised by her words. As I said earlier, most of our time with the family were spent in silence at the boating dock. But then God spoke to me and said "It wasn't what you said, it was simply because you were there."  

Sometimes we abandon our friends and family in their time of need because we are afraid of saying or doing the wrong things. By instinct we search for the words that will dry tears and make everything better and when we don't know what to say, we stay away. That can be a huge mistake if the person(s) didn't request privacy. People need love and support. They don't always need words. 

Lesson from God learned....It's not always in what we say, sometimes hearts are comforted simply because we were there.